Journey from 2009 to 2010

What was my achievement in 2009? When I look back at my life and take stock of the value of my existance, most of it was to work towards being a better mother. I am a career women. Not a very ambitious one, but I do love working and I especially enjoyed working in my organization. Being a working mother, I have gone through moments with pangs of guilt hitting me, especially because my younger daughter had to be at my home town Delhi, 2000 km away and we missed having each other all to ourselves.

My younger daughter is in 12th, the last lap of high school. I knew she will not be able to sail through with positive mindset if I were not available for her right there besides her. What did I want to achieve trying to give my child best education if she were to resent my absence in future. I guess part of education was to be with your family when they need you, whatever it takes. I knew I had to leave my job in order to do that because my organization did not have a division in Delhi.

I also explored various options that did not involve having to resign. I spoke with my collegues, my manager, our center head, the HR. Eventually my organization made way for me, wrote a policy especially for cases such as mine, and let me go for an year. I was indebted. This one year was the year to bond, to serve my relationship with my family and let me do the right thing.

There was a lot to do. Not only did the living condition of my delhi house had to improve, I had to improve too. We never realize it clearly, but we grow along with the children. When I shifted to delhi with my family, I was forced to look into every nook and corner of my personality, which was so tuned to being a working person with no growth on the emotional side which caters to the children's needs. There is an extra degree of sensitivity, another dimension which, if not used, can result in missing out a range of emotional development, which impacts our children irrevocably.

I was lucky. My father taught me how to give positive environment to allow expression of thoughts. I used those skills at home. As a result, my daughter gave me feedback on expectations and gaps in my attitude, perceptions, and organization skills which came as a huge surprise to me. First, on the capability of teenagers to think, the multiple dimensions, and the depth of their thought process. I kept tweaking and improving. Yet not there, but now we share a mother-daughter relationship which has a healthy future. Good memories, give and take, emotional support and involvement are the gifts of last years' hard work. I also am able to bond better with my elder daughter, who is finishing college at another city.

I am sure, my sensible daughters will be positive and constructive in their corresponding lives. This is what education is all about. One third of life's education, is given by parents, another by institutions and the rest by experience and learning. The right attitude, a sense of fairness, excellence in whatever you do, being competitive, but with self, to improve constantly, learn, develop emotional capability to respond to change, healthy lifestyle are some elements of leading a satisfactory life and contribute positively to the society. When you are true to yourself, everything else becomes easy.

I keep discovering more milestones in my life and at every milestone that I reach, I see new ones. This new year has affirmed my belief that one who keeps mind open, adapts and grows is never a loser. A very Happy new year 2010 to all who read this.